Reply to Girls in my daughter's GS troop are so rude

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
It depends. Tweens can be really sarcastic to each other and insulting toward each other, and they love it most of the time. If they start being disrespectful to adults, you have to take action.

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OP here. Some of the girls get shunned and that is a problem for me. However, my co-leader does not support me trying to discuss respect and getting them all together, not to be friends really, but to work as a team to do some good projects. So I feel like it's a waste of my time. Unfortunately, my daughter still holds out hope. [/quote]

My one and only fist fight in my life was in 10th grade, and this freshman girl was actively going out of her way to flirt with my boyfriend in front of me -- the more uncomfortable it made him, the more she'd pour it on.

She told a friend of mine that it was her mission to make him her boyfriend.   I wasn't jealous or intimidated by her, because I knew my boyfriend had zero interest.
I however WAS offended by the whole blatant display and thought it was really disrespectful.
I tried to do three right thing and sit down to talk to her and she refused, sho I warned her that my patience was running really thin and I was getting to the point of no return... she didn't care.

One day, she starting poking the bear just a little too hard, and I ended up grabbing her & throttling her in the middle of gym class.

Yes, I know, stupid me.. I know!

And to make matters worse, I started the fight on school grounds.

I'd never been in trouble before, like ever... and although, I threw the first several punches, the principal counted her antagonistic behavior as much as a detriment as my punches, because had she not started this little game of hers, I wouldn't have felt the need to attack her.

So, he told us he was going to try something new, because suspensions don't work, as they don't befit anyone but the kid who gets to stay home all day watching tv for 3 days in a row.

So, he forced she & I to eat lunch together for 2 weeks straight, I couldn't have my friends there & she couldn't have hers there. 
If at anytime we broke the rules or refused to go, a suspension is ordered and placed in our personal file for colleges to see.

The first three days were a combination of silent treatments, arguments, and passive aggressive comments... but on the 5th day something changed -- she'd just found out that morning that her parents were getting divorced, and she totally lost it, and was a mess crying... and *I* was her support system!

She apologized to me and explained why she did it, because she knew her dad was moving out any day now & she thought vying for the attention of an unavailable guy would be exciting & it would force her to concentrate less on the impending divorce, and her dad leaving.

After she apologized, things got much better and after day 5, we suddenly became friends. 
Now, 30 years later,  I'm proud to call her one of my very best friends in the world and the godmother to my daughter.

Maybe you can do something similar?
The twon of us hated each other and we thought hell would freeze over before we'd ever be friends, but crazier things HAVE happened.

Maybe you can group together the shunned girl with another girl for an activity (just don't pick the queen bee, as she's almost always a hopeless cause).

Maybe one of the other girls, one that's like a fringe, hanger-oner in their group, but one that's not fully enmeshed with them?

Can't hurt, right? 🤷‍♀️

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