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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I hear you OP. I am not even sure I’d want to travel without my DC because I think I’d miss them too much. But I do sometimes envy my friends with younger, more healthy parents because of the way they are able to be involved in their kids lives. Including, yes, overnights at grandmas and that kind of thing. I would appreciate the free childcare of course— who wouldn’t? But the bigger thing is the idea of having more people invested in and involved in my child’s life. Especially since we are unable to have another. When I see grandparents doting on, playing with, or just showing real knowledge of their grandkids, it is heartwarming and also gives me a pang. I know my child would love that but it’s just not part of the family we have. It makes me sad.[/quote]

OP here.  I think you hit on an important part of it that I didn’t really articulate.  The free childcare would be lovely but I think it’s the idea of having so many loving, capable family members around that are invested in and can be a real part of my children’s lives.  We love my parents but because of their health we usually see them for short visits, and always with me or my husband there.  My kids will never have the time and space to build a truly deep bond with them, I fear.  Looking at my friend with the eight actively involved grandparents makes me so wish my kids had that.

And yeah, the kid free vacations sound nice too.  But reading suggestions here from others about leaving the kids with nanny or a close friend made me realize I wouldn’t even want to do that.  It’s something specific about that special time with grandparents.  I would so love to be able to go on vacation and know my kids are having a genuinely enriching visit with their grandparents, rather than just having passable childcare.[/quote]

I feel this too!  I have a wonderful relationship with my dad and I always dreamed of seeing him having the kind of bond with my kids I had with his mother, who lived down the street from us when I was a teen.  But just after my first was born he got a serious cancer diagnosis and while he loves the kids, he’s obviously not really able to handle much time with babies.  I’m very lucky my mother is still healthy and loves being involved with our lives when she can, though![/quote]

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