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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Thank you all again for the advice and for the amazing cocktail from DCUM bartender! For those offering advice specific to sailboats: my husband is a lifelong sailor and has always had one. He just has his heart set on upgrading to really a much larger one with three cabins etc. And yes, they are that expensive even used, and he knows they don’t hold their value. We’d finance it— it would be a large monthly payment of about $3k plus of course slip fees, maintenance etc.
It’s not even about the boat for me so much as it is about the disregard for me. The other night when I told him I really don’t want to get this huge boat he said, “I don’t care what you want.”
Plus the lack of sex for 5 years, when I got tired of constantly initiating so just stopped, is a big problem. And the not-infrequent verbal abuse he throws my way is also a major, if not the core, issue.[/quote]
are you for real?  Because after reading all of this, I honestly cannot understand why you would stay with him.

-disregard of your wants/needs
-verbal abuse
-not bringing in any income even as he spends spends spends

What is the draw? I don't understand why you would still be in love with him?  [/quote]
I’m not still in love with him, but I have been with him for almost two decades. It’s not so easy to just leave. Luckily we don’t have kids but it’s still hard. I am going to talk to him this weekend about going to see a marriage counselor with me. I think I need a third party to moderate the discussion.[/quote]
agree, it's never easy to leave a 20 yr marriage, but if you are not in love with him; he is sometimes abusive; and doesn't support your wants/needs, then why bother, especially if there are no kids involved.[/quote]

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