Reply to Anyone find it hard to give up the DINK lifestyle to have kids?

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Reply to "Anyone find it hard to give up the DINK lifestyle to have kids?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Good Lord, if you don't feel the urge to have children, DON'T DO IT.  You are under no obligation to do so just because it's the standard course for most people.

I LOVE my children like nothing else and always knew I wanted children, but, on paper, it is absolutely foolish to procreate.  Having kids is insanely expensive, children take a BIG toll on a marriage (it's b.s. to say kids don't break up a marriage...they absolutely do!), you lose sleep, your body takes a beating with pregnancy, you are never free of worry...the list goes on.  There is no sane reason to do it which is probably why that biological drive is so strong to override the rational.
I personally am jealous of the people who don't want kids because I see how much easier my life could be.  However, I couldn't deny my urge and I love, love, love children (not just mine...babies and kids in general), so knew I'd be miserable without them.

OP, be thankful you are happy without kids and run with it!
[/quote]

OP here.  Yes, this would be easy if not for the fact that DH really, really wants kids.  And I understand why he wants kids.  Part of it is because he had a crappy childhood, and has a bad relationship with his family and he wants to do it right now that he could be a dad.  I have been putting pregnancy off for years now and now that I'm approaching AMA it's time to make a decision.  I think babies are great but I don't really like kids all that much--I guess it would be okay to be a parent of a young child but I worry about parenting an older child and teen--seems like so much stress and worry.

I think I'd enjoy the DINK lifestyle now and probably into my 40's but I think when I reached my 50's and older I'd be really regretful of not having a family.  DH and I both have small families and no relationship with extended families (cousins, aunts and uncles) so it would be nice to feel like I have some sort of tie.  [/quote]

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