Reply to Husband fell asleep drunk in delivery room

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would make sure he knows that if he doesn’t get treatment, there is no leeway for problem drinking going forward.  If he’s not fit to get up with the baby during the night because he’s drunk, that’s it and you leave.  Which isn’t to say you have to commit to getting divorced right then; if you leaving is the wake-up call he needs to get treatment and commit to stopping drinking, great.

Also, unfortunately you can’t leave the baby with him alone at a time when he might drink since he clearly doesn’t have control over his consumption.  If he’s not a morning drinker and you can get a break then, do it.  But you can’t go out with friends in the evening and leave the baby with him since you know he drinks to excess at night when you’re not around.[/quote]

OP I'm so sorry.  I am glad your mom was there.

I agree with this PP.  Your DH is clearly an alcoholic.  I mean the two interpretations of what happened are 1.  he is an alcoholic and drank even though he knew that was a terrible thing to abandon you and miss the birth of his child or 2.  he isn't an alcoholic, "can control it" (as he says) but didn't really care about the birth so chose to get drunk for fun instead.  Which one would he like to accept?

That said, he'll surely make excuses, but you don't need to wait for him.  You know what this is, and it isn't your fault, any of it. Protect your child -- get life and disability insurance for him ASAP and speak with a lawyer about your options in terms of finances, divorce and custody.  Armed with that you can start discussing with him options.  Plan your future with him as he is with anything improving as a bonus.  I'm sure that's not the thing you can do right now, but when you can.  My thoughts are with you. [/quote]

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