Reply to Boyfriend Wants To Get Back Together

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Has he articulated what he’s willing to change to address the reasons you broke in the first place?  Have you?  [/quote]

OP here. He’s a little older than me and is ready for marriage and kids. I want to get married but want to wait a couple more years to have kids. This is thy r main issue, but there is also city vs suburbs and which state we would raise our kids in. [/quote]

OP here. He has decided he is willing to wait until I’m ready to have kids. We also realize which state to raise kids in or suburbs vs city is something we can compromise on. I just couldn’t compromise on having kids before I’m ready. [/quote]

How old are you guys and why do you want to wait? Do you really want kids? [/quote]

OP here. I’m 30 and he is 37. We have been dating for a year. I love him and I’m very much still in love with him. We had a wonderful relationship but I initiated the talk about breaking up because I felt it was wrong to keep him waiting. He’s ready for kids and I’m not. I didn’t want that to a problem and source of resentment down the road.

I do really want kids. I just turned 30 and I want to wait 3-5 years. The earliest I would consider trying is two years. I just got an advanced degree that I want to put to use and build up my career before kids come into play. I worked really hard and don’t want to get pregnant next year and then be on maternity leave and then have to start building my new career with a baby. My hope is to build my career to the point I have a lot more flexibility and time when I do have kids to work less or have a good schedule.

He wants to get married next year and then immediately start trying for kids. We both want two kids. Im not ready for kids that soon.

He’s from VA and I’m from the Midwest. I would like to move back to the Midwest and he wants to raise a family in VA.

We can compromise on that, but the timeline of having kids is a huge issue for me. I worry that I may never find someone I see a future with if we end things for good. I also fear that I will have this pressure to be ready before I want kids if we do get back together. [/quote]

He'll be nearly 40 or in his 40s. can you not see how maybe he doesn't want to be an older dad especially if you want more than one child? You two are just not meant to be, no getting back together.[/quote]

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