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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How did your son successfully get his undergrad and graduate degrees? If you can identify what you did to help him create that outcome, that might provide clues as to how to guide him now.

From his "stop lecturing me" response, I wonder if he feels like you're treating him as a child rather than an adult. It might be adding to his depression (again, I'm speculating). There is a sense of dignity that comes with figuring things out without help from your parents, even if you fail and fail again.[/quote]

Where do you draw the line between offering (clearly) needed direction, and letting your adult ASD child fail once again? I've stopped offering him advice, but he can't manage his life on his own.

I can't imagine kicking him out as a PP suggested. Where would he go? He has no job. He can't afford an apartment. Would he couch surf?  Does an ASD person have to sink that low before realizing that they need to get their act together? He has only one friend who would let him sleep on his couch, BTW, so that arrangement wouldn't last long. [/quote]

The great thing about drawing a line in the sand is that you are not responsible for what he does or where he goes after that line is crossed. Where he would go is not for you to evaluate. 
You don't seem like you can understand this yet: the more you try to do for him the more resistant he will be and the longer you keep allowing him to live like a child, the less likely it is that he will ever leave.

I highly suggest you get counseling for yourself. You have alot of fear and pain over his life but the things you are doing will not help him. You have to do the hard thing.
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