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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t have any answers, but as the parent of a college student who is battling panic attacks and depression—some weeks better, some weeks worse—I want to thank the professors here who recognize these issues and are trying their best to help. My child certainly doesn’t expect to be given a break on grades, etc., but a little understanding and mutual respect does go a long way. She is truly trying her best to function in a system that is generally unforgiving. It is difficult for young adults who are eager to be independent to instead be struggling in a way that often requires help from counselors, psychiatrists, school staff/faculty, and parents.

Please know that your efforts to understand are greatly appreciated.[/quote]

Maybe a child like this needs to attend college from home? OR at least when their existing support network is very close by.

At some point are you all just denying the severity of your child's disability? Instead of communicating that she can achieve her goals, but it may take a different path than some of her friends.

(PS-My sister is a physical therapist. She said that sometimes she feels so bad for preschoolers whose parents are forcing them to try to do things that they are not physically capable of. They think if the kid just tries harder or tries the latest thing they read online or they switch therapists. But it is almost abusive that they won't accept their child's limitations.) I am not saying that is analogous...but sometimes you have to stop pushing the boulder uphill and find an easier path.[/quote]

I had severe anxiety and depression in college.  This was in the 90s.  Dropped out of one school, took a couple of years off and tried it again. It was better until it wasn’t anymore. Two professors agreed to give me an “incomplete” instead of whatever low grade I would have gotten and gave me until the end of the next semester to submit the papers I couldn’t write. I thought that was so kind. I ended up not being able to do that work and withdrew.

I went home and ended up getting some pretty intense therapy and medication, and then found a “real” job as office support staff (compared with the food service type work I’d been doing). Eventually I went back to college again in my mid-20s and nailed it. Went on to additional academic and professional success.

In retrospect I can see I was not ready for college. Both my parents have advanced degrees and it was expected of me so I did it, but I didn’t have any interest in it. I went to a big state school, highly rated, and was so lost there. I think that happens to more kids these days who have so much more pressure than we did 25-30 years ago. Getting to college is the goal then it isn’t clear what to do once they get there. And COVID makes it so much worse.

I’m rambling but my point is I think PP is onto something. The best thing I did was step away from college when I wasn’t ready for it. And my parents let me do it. They didn’t support me financially after I left school, other than the few months that I was incapacitated with depression and anxiety (which was huge support, I don’t mean to discount that). But they let me find my way when I was ready for it. [/quote]

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