Reply to Marrying over 50

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Marrying over 50"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’ve generally been in the “why marry again” camp. But at 55 and having seen my parents getting old, my mother dealing with my father’s decline and death, I am starting to see a benefit to being married as we age - having no issue making health and financial decisions for each other, funeral arrangements, etc. [/quote]

You can live with someone without getting married. [/quote]

But you have no legal rights or protections.[/quote]

What kind of legal protection do you want? you should have your own money. Especially after age 40. I actually found marriage to be the opposite of legal protection because I would’ve had far more wealth if I had stayed single. And I’m a woman. [/quote]

Things like having a say over medical treatment, end-of-life care. For example, I know a long-term couple, never married, that when one of them got seriously sick, the other one wasn’t able to to manage the partner’s care. Had no legal right and the hospital, nursing home wouldn’t let them. In fact, when the pandemic started couldn’t even see the partner and to finagle, threaten and cajole in order to get access because they weren’t “family”. Or seeing all the stuff my mother and I had to decide and arrange for at the end of my father’s life. If I’ve built a life with a partner I would want us to be each other’s person/decisionmaker if one of us is at that stage, and not the grown kids who may have grown distant or, worse, an estranged sibling or some other relative having greater legal rights over such decisions.

As I get older, I would want my partner and I to either get married with a prenup or get the whole slew of legal documents that would allow us to be recognized as each other’s “person”, caretaker, next-of-kin, whatever people want to call it. We don’t need each other’s money, retirement, etc. We’re both independent and well off. But it would be distressing if, as we got older, we lose the right to care for the other, honor one another’s wishes, end up being considered nothing more than a stranger, legally, when important decisions need to be made.

I’m the 55yo PP who’s reconsidering my “never marry again” position.[/quote]

How does the hospital even know you are not married? I've never been asked for marriage certificate when I go visit DH in hospital. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics