Reply to Ladies: When did you give up on finding a husband?

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Reply to "Ladies: When did you give up on finding a husband?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]When you aren’t looking is when you’ll meet someone.

I was just out of a long relationship, determined to just have fun being single and that’s when I met my husband.

I feel like women on the hunt have a desperation men can read/feel.  You usually aren’t at your best because you have an agenda instead of just relaxing and being yourself.

I always knew I’d be okay by myself.  I had a good career and did things for me when I wasn’t actively in a relationship.[/quote]

I feel like people speak out of both sides of their mouths on the issues you get told you have to actively look and make it your job and then you get told sit back and do nothing.

There's also this false assumption that wants to be married means you don't think you will be okay by yourself and have zero interests.[/quote]

DP.  [b]I think you need to get out and meet men, obviously, but not be desperate for marriage[/b].  I enjoy men as friends, and almost every long-term relationship I’ve had started that way. Just someone I enjoyed hanging out with, and then it evolved into more. Men are like cats — if you chase them, they run away. You have to let them come to you. [/quote]

I agree with the bolder, but personally would never recommend the friends first thing.  I can get super confusing had the most devastating relationship in my dating history this way.  I was a slow starter into the dating world too (abusive childhood), and the game playing thing just didn’t work well for me.  I would be honest about what you are looking for and try to enjoy the dates as people/men in the beginning rather than your future husband, but wouldn’t think of them as “friends.”[/quote]

Who says OP is chasing?[/quote]

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