Reply to How to handle SIL's concerns/feelings (a topic involving race)

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, do not listen to the naysayers. If your SIL is feeling that people are racists in your town, give her the benefit of doubt. If she is not regularly drama llama then imagine how hard it is for her to acknowledge the overt and covert racism that she is facing.  That is the way to win her and let her know that you all are on her side.

My recommendation would be to continue to visit her, visit with them on neutral place like a destination vacation or cruise (if that is safe),  and ask her input on how can you all make her feel safe to visit without pushing her.  Tell her that she is in control of the decision and you all want her to feel loved, respected and welcome in whatever space she wants to be with your family. [/quote]

OP here. i agree with you. Tricky part here is that any vacation spot I or my parents all nominate - cruise, resort, mountains, lake, snow, sun - she and my brother feel are too White and therefore uncomfortable. All they are willing to do is go to an urban environment - think Mexico City - which sounds great but is not really possible at this point due to the ages of the kids between us. Perhaps at a later date though. [/quote]

I gotta say, OP, you do sound awfully white.  I agree with your SIL about those vacations!  I wouldn’t want to go on any of them either. [/quote]

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