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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm an ultra orthodox woman. I was debating responding but I'll give it a shot
The issue most of my friends have isn't that Julia is making up things that never happen. There are plenty of sources for the hell boiling water (not acid) modesty punishment and yes, well, wait til you find out what fundamentalist Muslims and Christians believe.

The problem is we know her. We grew up with her. She did not come from a community like the one she describes. It's like the Nigerian prime minister coming to Harvard and speaking about his difficult life in inner city Chicago.[/quote]

I disagree. I know this community very well.  While some girls are educated most are not. Most married off at 18 to men they barely know. She is correct the "programming" is loud and clear.

My cousin is part of this community. Her first husband (matchmaker marriage) beat the crap out of her over and over again. Getting her GET was extremely difficult. She finally got one and remarried within the community.  Do you understand how awful that was? The community was more concerned about him than her. Forgive me for thinking she's still in a cult.

The modesty thing they are literally slut-shaming her on FB today over and over again. For people who claim to be so "religious," their behavior today has been horrific.

Jew here, that community is a cult. Period, end stop. [/quote]
Oj1
You are lumping several communities together. Most girls in Julia's high school went to seminary and got degrees and married between 19-25. 18 would be a lot more Haredi then she grew up.

As for matchmaker, every Haredi subtype has its own systems for matchmaking. I'm sorry your relative had a bad experience. I hope she finds peace.

I dated my husband around 10 x and then we got engaged, which is pretty typical. We are a happy couple.[/quote]

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