Reply to Teen cousin nonstop tickling DC, 5

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your instinct that something is off here is never to be ignored. Read “The Gift of Fear”. Gavin DeBecker says it beautifully: “your gut doesn’t know *why* you have this feeling, only that you have it to protect you (or your children).” You don’t need to examine this too closely. Your brain saw something it didn’t like out of protection for your son. Enough said.[/quote]

But the child has their own instinct,  their own gift. That must also be listened to and encouraged to develop.[/quote]

+1.

The is what some people ignore is that moms like OP cause their children to become fearful and frightened of all touch and all interactions. Now her child will be reluctant to interact with his cousins in any way because they are bad, and the cousins will be reluctant to interact with the op's child in any way not because they were doing or planning something nefarious, but because they don't want to be accused as such.. Then in 10+ years, OP will be writing about how her child is so anxious and fearful and can't seem to make friends or do anything their peers do, and she is worried how her child will function in college because he's so dependent on mom for socialization.[/quote]

No, honestly you are just better off playing with kids without putting your hands all over them. The same with greetings. There is no need for relatives to insist on hugging and kissing. We need to teachjng kids YOUNG about consent. Did the teen say "May I tickle you?" Any time you plan to be touching a kid like that there should be established verbal consent. Boundaries are important. It's not about never touching people. It's about always making sure you have their permission.[/quote]

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