Reply to is it appropriate to ask people origin of their last name? should it be?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. I get it's not poorly intended. But even as a white person, it gets really really old having to represent this culture, my connection to it, continually answer questions.

I appreciate the suggestions to not get into it more than is necessary- with the caveat that I DO think people want to chat about it, so cutting that off also starts to feel rude or like it requires more creativity/evasiveness than I'd like.

Basically, at LEAST 90% of the time I have to engage in or actively disengage in some sort of dialog when I first meet people about my name, it's origin, my background, etc.., and many times these are people I will not know for long.

So I get the respect that people want to pay, but when I say "you can just call me Jane" and people really, really want me to give them lessons on my name (again, I get this is well intended, but i don't like having to do this, it's tiring and I don't care if they butcher it personally).

[/quote]

There are some places where you have to give your real name - the DMV, doctor's office, school. But there are other places where you don't. Simply don't give that name where it's not necessary.

And, stop with all this "as a white person" nonsense. I'm mixed race and I get the questions all the time. It doesn't bother me but that's just me. It bothers you and that's sufficient.[/quote]

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