Reply to "Kids are resilient!"

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to ""Kids are resilient!""

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I agree with that statement in most cases. I do never say it though. Such generalizations are blase and passive-aggressive to me.
I don't think it means what people take it to mean or what you described as your take on it.
For example, my father was born in 1938 in former Yugoslavia. He was shorter than his older brothers. He lost his hair early due to some cradle issue that was not resolved. He was teased and called a German after the war due to his blonde hair and blue eyes. These are just superficial things you called bullying. The harsh reality of life made these well, not a big deal at all.
He finished college, became a good dad, built a house for us, took care of his family, and lived a full life.
My mom was a premie born in 1947 and lived in a shoebox next to a fireplace.  Her dad was an abusive alcoholic who used to beat her. She, too, became a successful woman who opened her own company and earned money to keep us fed during the 90s wars when survival was tough for all.
Today, perhaps we coddle our kids too much, and hence they might appear not to be resilient.
I bet you if we left the kids to their own devices in college and childhood, not neglecting, but letting them roam the neighborhood like DH and I did, he in the U.S., me back in former Yugoslavia, they would turn out fine, in most cases.
So, if your definition of kids doing fine is getting into MIT and not into UMD... well then, IMO, you have a wrong definition of what fine is.
[/quote]

It’s not about where anyone goes to college.  You don’t need to answer this, but the question is, did your dad beat your mom?  And did she think that was okay or normal?  If she didn’t, why not?  Who provided that safety net for her and told her that she didn’t deserve that?  Who told your dad that it wasn’t okay to beat or bully people weaker than himself, when that was what he experienced growing up?  Also, why did your dad stop providing for your family during the 90s wars and leave it to your mom?  [/quote]
What? What does my grandpa beating my mom has to do with my dad? Who said my dad stopped providing in the 90s? He did, but mom earned more, and more was needed. Why would it have to be dad-providing and not both? Dad also worked and on and off it was what he earned or what mom earned that provided. How does one exclude the other? My dad did not bully anyone, he was bullied, why would that automatically make him a bully? He was never a bully.
What chip do you have on your shoulder that makes you come to these wild projections?[/quote]

Wait.  Are you serious with these questions?  They aren’t wild projections.  
Have you never heard of Freud, the unconscious mind?

Have you ever heard of Charles Darwin?  I feel like you are going to ask me next how humans could have evolved from monkeys.

The answer to your questions is definitely interesting and worth learning!  But it is beyond the scope of a parenting chat board.  [/quote]
You are not my parents' therapist. You are just a looney on dcum! The question is are kids resilient? The answer is yes![/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics