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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]“So I looked and sure enough, she's not checked her College X email, or opened her high school email from College X.”

OP, this is a huge red flag to me. Why do you even have access to your DD’s high school email or college email? Did you regularly check her emails during high school? Having passwords and checking your kid’s email is a huge invasion of privacy and is not appropriate. Does your DD have ADHD?  Maybe sign her up for an executive function crash course this summer? [/quote]

NP-I respectfully disagree.  Every family is different.  In our family if a minor child has an email account the parents have full access to it.  We don't read every email but we are able to.  When our dd was a junior in high school we created a completely new email account for her to be used for college applications. I would regularly check that email account to see if there were any time sensitive emails.  Then I would remind her that she needed to check her emails more often.  It is a lot for high school seniors to handle. She got better at it. As she got better at it I faded out. I want my teens to learn how to be independent but it doesn't need to be an all or nothing situation.  Once she had picked a school we reminded her how to unsubscribe from other school emails systems so that she would not get flooded by junk email. When she was 18 and leaving for college we talked about her changing her password and that we no longer needed access.  She said she was fine with us having it and that it was nice to know we were able to get in in an emergency. And it has come in handy.  This past week she was on a school trip with no electronics.  Before she left she asked me to check her email daily in case anything came in that needed to be dealt with before she got back.  It did. The company that the school uses for fridge rentals emailed her and she had 48 hours to reply or we would lose our security deposit. This set up works for our family.[/quote]

We did the same with our DD but it started sophomore year because she was going through athletic recruiting and had to me constantly emailing coaches etc.  It also became her college application email.  My husband and I had it on our phones so we would check it at least every few days and my daughter was really happy to have us involved.  She has pretty much taken over everything at this point but it was a good system for our family.

For the OP, I wanted to say that being an ED student potentially contributes to this because I saw it a bit with my DD who go into her ED school in December when there was nothing going on for months in her portal.  It just fell off her radar even while she was on the group email chain getting to know classmates.  I nudged her to check a few weeks ago and she filled out her housing forms which were now (months later) on the portal.  No emergency, just that she is really busy with sports, end of senior year etc.  She does also have ADD but she has been working on this for years and has figured out how to manage things.

Everyone will have a different path so the reactions from some parents are foreign to others. Our way may not work for other families but it seems to be working for us.  Good luck OP![/quote]

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