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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]PP, people are just trying to problem solve, which is what people do, when I think what you are looking for is just some empathy/sense of shared experiences.  I think you're thinking about this the right way, which is that it is a loss that you need to grieve.  So, do that.  There are books on how to deal with this type of grief -- not the loss of a loved one, but the loss of some expected life path.  Find those books.  Maybe see a therapist for awhile to help you sort through the emotions.

I'm not at your life stage yet, but I think I would feel similarly to you if I ended up in this situation.[/quote]

I think what the OP feels sad about is that she did everything 'right' by making family the center of her world and her children also got to interact with their cousins etc. But she seems to have no understanding of the structural reasons as to why things are the way they are. It sounds like she's never had a career so of course she was able to be so family-oriented. Now it's 2021, and people have broader definitions of family and I wouldnt be surprised if her kids prefer to spend Thanksgiving with friends than schlep all the way back to the OP's. There is more to life than having children and OP needs to get that in her head.[/quote]

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