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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, it sounds to me like you have many activities, but long for time with family.  It also sounds like you don't have many friends, perhaps because you spent so much of your time focused on family.  So, if I were you, I'd reach out and try to connect with some of the people you know as acquaintances through your shared activities.  That's how you make friends.  And, if you want to spend more time with family, I would stop dreaming about what you'd expected in the way of continued intergenerational events -- possibly centered on you and your husband as matriarch and patriarch.  Instead, why not visit your kids, siblings, nieces and nephews?  Heck, get an RV and drive a circuit of family visits.  But, really, don't dwell on what might have been.  That's a sure recipe for misery.     [/quote]

You think I have  few friends? Where did that come from?

Reread my post. I have  many friends.  Not only are they friends from my activities, I have friends from the time I was a child.  I also have  a large extended family with a lot of cousins.

And..what do you think they  are all doing right now? Yes! They  are ALL involved with their growing family.

They all say things like "Just wait until it's your turn!" Or " You never know,  "#$%# will change her mind, she'll probably have kids."  I am  actually not promoting these comments, nor am I complaining to them. I am very careful not to...which is why  I am doing it here. So, don't act like I'm limited in my thinking  since  this is a common theme among  most that I know now.

You will notice how the going advice is to  just  get out of town.  Do it in a plane, in a car, in a RV. So, implicitly, even you admit there's not  much life here,  so now I should  go look at stuff  and museums and other people's families.

And, no, we don't have "Miss Ellie" patriarch and matriarch fantasies. Lol. That was  the best one yet..I have to hand it to you.  Laughed OUT LOUD.

I was surrounded by family my whole life, my parents were as well, and I just didn't expect it to dead end on a dime. It's unbelievably sad  to me even though I do have friends and plenty of  things  to do. I am also close  with my children, but one lives overseas and  the other is  closer geographically, but career involved, which is fine. No judgements.  She has that choice.

Would  you say these things to younger parents who can't have kids of their own? That their dream of having a family  can  be supplanted by a hobby or just getting into an RV or, how about  getting involved in  someone else's family? You may say that we already had our family and should  be grateful,  and  we understand that  and  even agree.However, people's values  of what is important vary. Mine was always about family. I don't effing care about  bunco, golf, tropical travel. It's simply that, with a twist of continual growing older without family. It's not  like I can throw myself into a career at this point, or I can, I am already doing it, but it's not long  term.

It's just the acceptance of a loss.  I get it. I was just wondering how others were managing a paradigm change in their life trajectory.

[/quote]

It’s no longer the 1950s OP! It sounds like you’re disappointed that your children aren’t making time for you.[/quote]

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