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[quote=Anonymous]OP, this will be a major boundary violation on your part if you are to proceed in any way whatsoever as it affect yours sons marriage and his fiancé’s handling of HER OWN past.

If you can no longer look at her the same that is your problem and not hers. She is not responsible for you emotions, and you are not for hers.

There is a reason why posters here are responding with such intensity. What you are suggesting causes a visceral “No!” reaction in people’s guts because it is so wrong. Such a violation of trust, boundaries and emotions on your part

You mention your own trauma, and I am so sorry you went through that! But it sounds like the way you are suddenly put off, suspect, anxious, and inclined to violate your son and future dil’s relationship might actually be a trauma response itself.

Please seek counseling or read some professional literature on boundaries. There is so much out there. Also, moving forward I would not seek out information about people from anyone aside from that person. It is gossiping and a background conversation, even if the intent is good. [/quote]

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