Reply to Sister is angry family discusses physical resemblances in front of adopted child

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Sister is angry family discusses physical resemblances in front of adopted child "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My kids aren’t genetically related to me (queer couple, wife carried) and they know that as well as know they’re donor conceived.

That said, one of my sons does look a LOT like my grandfather when he was a boy.  Though we know it isn’t possible, we talk at times about how much he looks like my side of the family.  I always tell him its because I wished him into being.

His other brother does not look like my side of the family at all, but we find other things that “my side” has in common with him like his sense of humor, his enjoyment of sports, etc.

At the end of the day, for our family (and I have a very big extended family) - it’s about inclusivity. We are blessed with families built from adoption, blended families, multiracial families, childless aunties and uncles but I, and I think others in my family, work to make sure they all feel welcome and valued.

It sounds to me like your sister is worried that her daughter won’t or isn’t welcomed or valued in the same way as her birth son. I think a conversation is worthwhile.

“Hey Larla, I’m sorry you felt left out or awkward when Mom was comparing Bobby to Uncle Mike. Boy that is SOME NOSE, huh?  What we love about Susie is that she makes the very same face you do when she is mad, and that she always wants to play chutes and ladders just like her cousin Phylis. I hope you know how glad we are that Susie is in our family and we love her to pieces.”[/quote]

This is a logical and loving approach IMO.  I wish I was a member of your family![/quote]

I love your post and I love that you tell your son you wished him into being. That is one of the sweetest things I’ve read on dcum![/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics