Reply to Anyone else have to be very restrictive to stay thin?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What do you mean by invisible? I’m in my early 50’s and not sure what you mean.[/quote]

They're repeating a misogynistic old trope that is not true - talk about internalized sexism!
Are they talking about the attention of males between 20 and 30? Because everyone else is looking!
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No, I am speaking from experience. People might still look and observant people will notice your appearance. They just don't care. It is extremely different from when you are younger and people are genuinely interested in your appearance as a woman, because they view you as a potential partner or as competition for a potential partner or they are trying to figure out if you are pregnant. I'm not saying it's good that people think that way. And if you'd asked me at the age of 35 if that's how people are, I would have said no, that's crazy. But now I'm in my 40s and this is absolutely true.

I am sure there are exceptions to this. If I were single and dating, for instance, obviously my appearance would matter on the dating market. I also assume that people who aren't heterosexual may have other experiences because there may be less of a focus on fertility. But the experience of most to the heterosexual women I know, and especially the ones who are married and/or have kids, is that interest in you as a person drops way off right around 40. People talk to you less. Strangers aren't as nice to you, unless you are with your kids and they are interested in your kids. [b]And it's not just men in their 20s and 30s who lose interest. Men in their 40s/50s used to look at me so much when I was younger that it was annoying. Now that I am the peer of men that age, they look right through me. It's gross.
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But for what it's worth, I'm still thin and it doesn't change any of the above. Other women sometimes comment on the fact that I've stayed thin, but it does not increase interest or attention in me. I'm just another middle age lady, and the details are not that interesting to most people.[/quote]

PP you replied to. I'm 40 and speaking from experience too. The bolded tells me that perhaps I never attracted the kind of attention you attracted when you were younger! I don't notice any difference in the way people look at me now compared to a decade ago. I had kids young, I've been accompanied by a kid since I was 25, so maybe that plays into it, apart from workplace situations, of course. I feel people look at me just as much as they did before, and just as courteously as before. Literally no difference. So if what you're talking about is the consequence of diminished sex appeal... well, I can't miss what I never had, can I? :-) And the reality is that without it, people consider you as a just another human being, not more, not less. Welcome to normal life.

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