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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hi OP, I was you awhile ago. I’ve got two kids now. We are a dual income family. It sucks.

But! No one would ever have kids if the choice was sleep vs. no sleep, or having disposable income vs. spending all our money on your kids.

You need to be thinking long-term... over my expected lifespan of 60-80 more years, will the joy of having children outweigh the fact that no one gets sleep with a newborn?

That’s a “heart” decision, not a dollars and sense decision.[/quote]

Objectively my child free friends have a lot more perks in life than I do (more sleep, more travel, ability to go full throttle in their careers, more disposable income, more time for self care, etc.). I can totally understand the appeal of that lifestyle and there are days I would kill for silence and a nap. And plenty days I’ve had to power through working sick (from home luckily I have a telework-friendly job) because I need to save sick leave for when my kids are sick.

But then there are also dance parties in the kitchen, family board game/movie nights, sweet toddler giggles to help get through the early mornings, the art work made of tiny handprints hanging on my fridge, the unintentionally hilarious things my kindergartner says, snow ball fights on snow days, bedtime snuggles, introducing my oldest to the joys of Mario Kart, a reason to bundle up and get some fresh air even on a chilly day, a hand sneaking past the shower curtain to show me an awesome Lego creation that could not wait, etc

It’s hard to tangibly quantify why anyone would have kids. If you make a pro/con spreadsheet there is no logical reason to have children. Like a PP said, it’s a decision of the heart. Neither choice is wrong.

A few things that help as a working parent though — flexible jobs ideally with telework, a partner who shares in parenting duties, nearby family help is the jackpot if you have it, money for babysitters and a reliable childcare center, COFFEE and did I mention COFFEE?[/quote]

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