Reply to WWYD: Husband won't let me work part-time

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op, I got a tip from someone on this forum and it worked pretty well for us.

Have a board in a visible common area with 3 sections: to do, today, done.  Then on small post it stickies, write down every thing that needs to get done weekly/daily/monthly.  You can color code however works best for you. For me, I color coded by daily vs weekly vs occasional like doctor/dentist appointment and parent teacher meetings. So everything like homework help, wash dishes, mowing lawn, wipe counters, vacuum floors, laundry.

Each morning or late evening, you reset the board with what needs to be done that next day. And whoever completes a task, moves the sticky note to the done section. I really did not have much discussion with DH about it because he is infuriatingly defensive. But this system allowed him to see all the things that need to get done and he can pick and choose what he can do.

So in your situation, I’d tell him the current situation isn’t working for you. That either you go part time or you split responsibilities 50/50. He’ll say you can’t go part time. So then set this system up and then set aside an evening to divvy up 50/50.  If he can’t take on half and continue to do so, you go part time.[/quote]

Oh and I agree with PPs about the laundry. You each should be capable of and doing your own laundry. Essential and basic life skill.[b] Let it pile up until he runs out of clean socks and underwear. He will figure it out.[/b][/quote]

The people who are saying this kind of thing, just don't get it. HE will let his laundry pile up and buy new boxers and socks before doing it. She doesn't want to live with a pile of a month's worth of dirty laundry in her bedroom, that's why she does it.

Same with scrubbing the toilets, cleaning the showers, changing the sheets, etc. If she wants it done before months go by, she has to do it herself.

Ask me how I know this  :roll: [/quote]

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