Reply to Oldest son has a lot of animosity towards middle son

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had a situation like this and I truly blame my parents. I think my sister was filled with a lot of anger because honestly both my parents were narcissists and were super focused on themselves. Then they would play us all off each other and play favorites. It was just constant tension. My sister directed a lot of her frustration at me, because when you're in that situation, you cant direct the anger at the narcissists or parents, because it's not safe, so you have to go for the easier target. I think my parents wereboth so self involved and they often used the "We'll just let them figure it out" cop out. They should have gotten involved, for both our sakes, but I think they thought it was too much work and would rather sit back and just watch the show. I also think they enjoyed us fighting, in a way, because when we were united as siblings, it was kind of like we were a team and our parents were the other team, whereas when we were arguing, we had no unity and no fighting power with them.

All these things should be considered and I think you should talk to a therapist for EACH OF YOU. These dysfunctional situations never just randomly happen in a vacuum. And they take time and effort to unpack.  But you can either do it now, or let your kids do it on their own when they're 30 and starting to really resent how you handled things. [/quote]
OMG! You get it. OP should truly listen to what you have to say. Didyou get the impression that op and her 14 year old are a team?[/quote]

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