Reply to Children of parents in sexless marriage - how did it affect your relationships and marriage?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]People always stress the negative results on kids from a unhappy marriage but don’t really talk about the results of a happy marriage.  My parents have been married 70 years—they certainly fight but they love each other a lot.  My dad calls my mom luvamylife, and he kissed her every single morning before leaving for work.
I think I was totally unprepared to recgonize any red flags—and I think my siblings sort of were in the same boat.  I am in a miserable marriage because for years I told myself that people who love each other put the work in and stick it out.  Maybe with miserable divorced parents I would have been more guarded, less trusting and naively optimistic?  If nothing else good comes of this, I think at least my daughter will be a little more wary than I was.  Some people may think that’s screwed up, but I think it’s an advantage.  [/quote]

I’m quite sure you are in the minority! You simply married wrong. Don’t blame your happily married parents for your failings. [/quote]

To be clear, I do not blame my oarents in the least.  But I frequently see people saying “My parents divorced and I have trust issues and didn’t get married until my thirties.”  I see that and I think “Wow—I wish I had had trust issues!  So much better than being too trusting.”  Several of my siblings have fantastic marriages.  One of my sibs married an actual con artist.  I just think we well all pretty trusting and it worked out for some of us and not others.  I honestly hope my kids are more guarded. 
Really, I don’t think anyone should blame their parents for their own relationship issues...we all make our own choices and its childish to say that it’s becaise your parents got divorced, or didn’t, or whatever.  [/quote]

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