Reply to Wife's odd reaction to my parents and "fun secrets"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My wife (we are a wife/wife family fyi) had a very odd reaction to a little game the kids started with my mom. We just recently a few weeks ago expanded our bubble and a big part of that has been seeing both my mom and wife parents as well. My oldest (5) told my wife and myself she has a secret thing she does with grandma when baby is asleep. She was all giggles and my wife laughed and played along for a second but then it turned and she got mad. She said it wasnt appropriate for my mom go "do this to Larla, and set these expectations/secret traps." I think shes crazy and we both know my mom wouldnt start anything dangerous. She really didn't come around and really emphasized it made her feel uncomfortable. The secret by the way is they eat popsicles in bed and watch butterbean cafe when the baby is asleep. Totally innocent and something a 5 yr old would think is fun and scandalous.  What am I not seeing here? I'm not even particularly close with my mom but dont see any real issue here.[/quote]

Your Wife is right.  teach your child no secrets In our family only surprises.  Sadly sex predators exploit this ‘game’.  My mom does the same thing and I had to correct her, which flustered her of course.  It’s nothing against your mom it’s the precedent it sets for the child.  You basically want your kid to say ‘grandma we don’t have secrets in our family but we can have surprises!’  [/quote]
+1. Surprises are great, secrets are not, especially those that happen in the bedroom (not that grandma is doing anything inappropriate)[/quote]

This![/quote]

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