Reply to Luxury Assisted Living No Longer Worth It?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  Thanks for all of the replies, thoughts, ideas, and opinions.

Specially thanks to PP's who stated that BIL is a jerk.  Yes he is.  He told us if we did not contribute, he would pull ALL of his financial support and try to find her a medicare facility.  We love her and did not want to have her life uprooted.  We decided to contribute to keep the peace.  She loves/loved her new life there.

Then covid hit.  Then my husband took a 20% pay cut.

But I guess we are on the hook and we will just have to keep contributing every month.  Does seem like too much money but not much we can do about that now.  I just feel bad for her being stuck alone in her apartment going on months now.

Our retirement is on track.  We have about $800K in 401Ks.  DH is lucky to be in a fully funded pension plan and we expect about $7.5K a month.  We are hopeful to inherit another $1M from my father who is also 93 but don't want to count on that as his in-home elder care is also expensive.

We are thinking of reducing contribution to our 401Ks.  I just think I am feeling unsure about the future due to covid as are many.

DH and I are in our early 60s.  Fortunately we only have one child which allowed us to save a lot.

Anyway, thanks again.  And to the PP who doubted my figures, I posted an explanation on Page 2 I think.  I wish my math was wrong! [/quote]

Being on the hook for someone else's retirement home when you are of retirement age yourself is not good.  I think you should find a less expensive place for your MIL.

You are right at that age when you or your spouse could get sick or maybe you'll have grandchildren that you need to help out with.  You just never know.  You are expecting to get approx $7.5K/month in retirement which is 90K and not too shabby.  But when you subtract the 24K that you spend on your MIL's care each year that brings your income down to $66,000/year.  Yes, people get by on much less than 66K in retirement but this is not the income that you have worked and saved your entire adult life for.  And what happens when you need long term care for both you and your husband?  You see how expensive things are, right?  Do you want to put your own adult child in the position of paying for your assisted living?

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