Reply to Stepfamily and sentimental things like photos after dad passed away.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m sorry that you are going through this, OP.

You sound like a good person. You visited your father, and had him visit you. You helped him out financially when he needed it.

Attending the funeral service is less important than the time you spent together when he was alive.

I think it’s fine to reach out politely and inquire about the things they agreed they would send to you. If you still do not receive them, maybe find a way to let that go, or ask them to set the things aside and hopefully you can come and get them at some point. It seems that the hospice nurse sensed something was odd about the way and speed they handled things, and took the initiative to let you know, which was kind of her.

I’m very sorry for your loss, and yes, I think some posters here are not reading carefully and/or are being judgmental.[/quote].

Thank you, that is good advice! [/quote]
Op, I’m sorry for your loss. Step family dynamics are really hard. I’m sorry you weren’t able to take the photos when you saw your dad. The reality is your step siblings may not know what you think is important. As a pp said, they also may want some acknowledgement that they took care of your father. I know that I have not given that to my former step family but I’m not able to do that yet for reasons that have nothing to do with money (they did something at the funeral I can’t get over). Try to continue to reach out but realize the memorabilia may be lost but at least you have your memories.[/quote]

His siblings and I did thank them for helping him when we were there. He really was very independent until his last few weeks. The hospice nurse was surprised that he was still driving when she first met him.The stepfamily also tried with no luck to convince him to have a home/health aide. They helped him to close out his bank account, before he went to hospice, and helped him send out his last bills.

My Aunt and I  sent cards to thank them after he had passed away. I also sent them a check. We heard, from them, that the small service was nice and they would send e-photos from it but they never did and we don’t know why. We do have good memories. My aunt and I had talked of having a gathering   to honor him, here, after quarantine.
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