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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here: no, I was not going to cash out. 
It's just dragging on and on: first, stbx does not have his grant agreement and doesn't want to ask HR, so I would need to pay for the employment record subpoena (stbx is strangely ok with being subpoenaed). 
then, there would be some valuation process for the shares (which I can theoretically do myself as per formula) - but it takes time.
then there is the preparation of agreement and judgement documents (about 4 hrs of lawyer time)
then negotiations start, stbx does not have a lawyer yet and I think we can avoid it, but that will be a drawn out process I think (at least 2 hrs)
I mean, we are looking at about 7 hrs x 350 here... If I were employed, I would go for it. As it is, I am not sure if I should proceed.

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Does your state not recognize the concept of a request for production of documents from the other party?  We have such a thing in VA and it's different than a subpoena in that the receiving party cannot charge a fee for production of those documents.  It is pretty wide-ranging and can cover things not in their possession but that they have access too (i.e. bank statements, pay stubs, etc.).  Does your state not recognize interrogatories?  You could get that information this way as well.[/quote]

I know this sounds weird but it is easier and quicker for me to get the docs from his employer than from him (he is going to drag it on, and if I press him by legal means... it's just not how it works among us so far. We are amicable on the surface yet I need him to do something he doesn't want to do). It is more expensive, I realize that.

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Why do you feel you are entitled to his earnings post separation?  Why should he give anything post spermatozoon?[/quote]
This is beyond the scope of this discussion.
My question is what I should do now.
1) put divorce on hold
2) convert the petition from divorce to legal separation (only makes sense if his insurance will take me on as a legally separated spouse - to be researched)
3) go through divorce as planned (will need an extra 3+K I think - subpoena, agreement prep, agreement review, negotiations, judgement documents prep). I am not going to go to court so hopefully not much more. 
4) go through divorce quickly and cheaply but lose out on support and such

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