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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Yes, I have elementary aged school kids.

By moving forward, I mean, I’d like to be able to be there for dinner and not have her hide, I’d like to share certain holidays together, I’d like to participate in some of their family activities without her declining—as we move forward to marriage.  Last summer, I often spent time at their community pool where she lifeguarded and she would flip out. It’s hard to back off because I don’t know what that looks like in situations like the pool. Do I just not go? That’s not a relationship I want to be in when all remaining kids seem ok but I do want to be understanding and do the right thing. We are all torn on how to approach this.[/quote]

I’d like
I’d like
I’d like
This is not about you.  What you want and what she wants are not the same.  She does not want to have a relationship with you, no matter how nice you think you are.

The right thing is to respect the fact that she does not want to have a relationship with you.

Continue to see the Dad at times when he does not have custody.  Or, if you’re looking to create a relationship where you spend family time with your partner’s family, move along and find someone else. [/quote]

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