Reply to If your spouse lost all interest in sex, could you stay married?

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Reply to "If your spouse lost all interest in sex, could you stay married?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] I'll explain why this happens with us. DH has never shown any physical affection except as a prelude to sex. So when he approaches with a kiss or a pat on the behind, I know that reciprocating means that he will expect sex to follow. If I don't want to raise false expectations, I have to be indifferent to the casual physical affection. I wish it were different, because I actually love to hold hands, cuddle, etc. But I learned a long time ago that I can't have that all by itself without being considered a tease.[/quote]

OP back again. This is a good insight and pretty helpful to hear. It’s not really the case that I’m only physically affectionate when I want sex, or that I take any affection on her part as a cue for sex...but now that you mention it, I think SHE thinks that’s the way I think, and shies away as a result. That’s pretty straightforward to clear up (I hope), but that’s the easy part of the conversation. I often like to feel physically close without needing or expecting sex. The part of the conversation about, you know...actually having sex...will be harder. 
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