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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If she is pumping every 2-3 hours, she is not getting REM sleep.  One needs 4 hours (or so)  in a stint to do that.  That would concern me.  If she is getting at least one 4 hour stint, then I would not be as worried.  [/quote]

OP here. She pumps everyday at 7, 10, 1, 4, 7, 10, 1, and 4. Sometimes she will do every 2 hours between 1 and 7 because she said she gets the most milk then. I am not the only one that as noticed a change in her. Her mom, my MIL, and her sister have all said the same thing and have tried to talk to her about it. I had suggested introducing more formula multiples times to lessen the stress on her, but she rejected the idea. I'm not controlling and this has nothing to do with it. This has to do with wanting a wife and mother ( for my son) who is present, happy, and in a good mental state. She is none of those things. She rarely spends time with our son because she is in the bedroom pumping. [/quote]

OP here. We even hired a sitter because she felt like she couldn't pump and watch our son at the same time. We are older parents and she wants to start trying for a second baby when our son turns 6 months. I think that will be too much stress on her. I'm just trying to help. She has done an amazing job so far, but our son is happy, healthy, and thriving, and he doesn't need a distressed out mom. He will be fine with formula. [/quote]

Take your focus of breastfeeding for a little bit. It would be good to approach her as someone who may be going through post partum depression. You wouldn't just come out and say she is depressed. Maybe ask how she is feeling; you can share that you are worried about her. If she is willing have her check out by her dr. Don't mention breastfeeding. As of now, you don't know if breastfeeding is the cause or a symptom of what is happening to her. Even if she doesn't have PPD, she maybe anxious. Having a 4 month old can do that to you even without the breastfeeding issue.[/quote]

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