Reply to I’m not dating material and I don’t know why?

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Reply to "I’m not dating material and I don’t know why? "

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You’re picking the wrong type of guys. You’re attracted to the wrong ones. [/quote]OP, this pp is correct.  It's not that good guys aren't attracted to you.  It's that you're choosing to go after guys who don't suit you.  You need to do therapy to understand why that is happening.  I went after unavailable guys for years until I did therapy (individual and group) which helped me understand that I was afraid of intimate relationships and therapy helped me face those fears and overcome them.  If you're like me, you're making bad choices and telling yourself you want a relationship when in reality you're making bad choices because an intimate relationship is scary.  Please consider therapy.[/quote]

May I ask why imitate relationships scared you? If it’s too personal, I completely understand.

[/quote]Not too personal.  Grew up in an alcoholic household where people didn't have boundaries.  I realized at some point through therapy that my problem was that I had lousy boundaries and that I was subconsciously protecting myself by being attracted to men who were not available and therefore their needs were not a threat to my sense of self.    If you feel you shouldn't say "no" to other people - especially intimate partners - you find other ways to put yourself in a situation where you don't have to say "no."[/quote]

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