Reply to If someone has too extravagant a party or home, would you not reciprocate?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Generally I know that I am not going to have much in common with someone who lives in a mansion or a big flashy house. We just have different values and priorities and it is unlikely we would hit it off. It isn't about income but how people choose to live. We generally look to invite people over and build friendships with people with similar lifestyles or common philosophies towards life.

I am not impressed by lavish displays of wealth.[/quote]

This exactly. I just don’t have much in common with someone who lives in a big house. [/quote]

I truly don't understand this way of thinking.  I went to a private school with very wealthy people (we were rich but not RICH) and one of the nicest, most down-to-earth, friendliest families we knew lived in a huge house.  The dad was a builder (mostly commercial) and they had like an eight-car garage and the kids rooms were in different wings and they had multiple living rooms but they were very generous, kind, and loving people and the size of their house had nothing to do with that.  They were super involved with their church, had a very close-knit family, donated tons and not just their money but their time, took in foster kids, etc.  Seriously, some of the best people I've ever encountered.  I think anyone who judges someone by the size of their house, large or small, is kind of a jerk.[/quote]

I never said they wouldn't be good people. I said we wouldn't have much in common due to differences in lifestyles and philosophies. There are lots of people in the world who are lovely people in their own way but we aren't going to be best friends due to our differences. There are lots of lovely amazing people living in the poorest neighborhoods too  - but no one is inviting them over just because they are lovely. When you have your big dinner parties and holiday parties in your mansions how many people are you inviting that are on public assistance. Likely not many. Not because they aren't wonderful lovely people but because you have very different lifestyles.

Having a massive home or wearing only name brand or having eight cars or taking 20K vacations are personal choices that are made based on what is important to someone in their life. They choose where to spend their resources based on what they value. I am not saying that is wrong, I am saying it is very different from what we value. We just don't have much in common at our cores. We can still chit chat about a movie we both saw or discuss the weather and enjoy the talk but these aren't people that I am going to work to build relationships with. Our lives are just too different. [/quote]

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