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[quote=Anonymous]I am now a government lawyer but spent a decade in biglaw, and had 2 kids during that time.  You do not need to quit, and you can do this!

Definitely switch to drop offs and have your husband handle pick ups.  I was lucky - I had a husband who worked but with a much more flexible schedule.  Both kids were in daycare and my husband almost always did pickups.  That was key.  In my experience, most folks in biglaw don't come in early (although I think people come in earlier in DC than NYC), so even if you go to work super early no one will know and instead will see you leaving at 5.  It doesn't matter what the junior associates think but when more senior people come in late, you will inevitably get emails in the afternoon that you have to deal with by the end of the day.  Five pm is just too early.  I've been a government lawyer for over 5 years, and I still don't leave at 5 (I guess many do, but I've never had a position where that's an option).

This may be unpopular, but as others have noted you shouldn't worry too much about missing bedtime.  You should plan to leave early-ish on Friday nights and spend weekends with the baby, but Monday - Thursday let your husband handle bedtime so you can get your work done.

Longer term, think about moving close to work if that's at all an option.  It took me close to an hour and half to get to work with daycare drop off  and it would have been great to live closer.  So if you are renting, I'd think about moving closer.  Also, and you probably are already doing this, but do all your grocery and baby shopping online, hire a cleaning person, have meals delivered, laundry picked up, etc. - outsource as much as you can.  Even with student loan debt, your salary should afford you some room to throw money at the problem.  It can help.  And if you keep daycare and don't switch to the nanny, the cost difference could cover these extra expenses.

Before considering a reduced hours schedule, I would do a lot of research about how part-time schedules work at your firm and whether it works for your practice area.  I tried going 80% with my first kid and it wasn't worth it.  At my firm, they paid you 80% during the year and if at the end of the year you worked more than 80% of the average of your class year, they paid you the difference.  I worked 110% that year.  So I basically just got deferred comp with no interest.  However, there are some practice groups where I suppose it could work.  I was a litigator and it's not really possible IMO.  Also, maybe firms are more progressive on this issue now, but for me the mommy-track perception was real for those on reduced hours.

For those telling you to quit, if you want to quit of course you can.  But it's really too early to tell if you need to and you want to set yourself up for the next job.  Good luck![/quote]

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