Reply to The impossiblity of mothering

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think you need to get over the idea that your primary role is to be loving. Being a disciplinarian (TEACHING your kid)  is equally important. My son is only 8 now but he sounds a lot like your kid.  I'm disturbed that you've conclude he's "not good," as opposed to considering that you lack parenting skills.  My son responds extremely well to incentives. I've long since given up the idealized notion that he should respond to softly spoken conversations about the values of being "kind" or whatever.  All kids want what they want; that's normal. [/quote]
I think he needs the opposite, loving. He needs boundaries too, but mostly loving. In most kids issues are caused by lack of something. Usually it is the attention they seek. Now, this kid doesn't have a dad, could be that op is not able to fill this particular need. She clearly works and has kids to take care of. Somethings gotta give. This child likely tried to get what he needs and after repeatedly failing, gave up. He has come to a conclusion that he will never get it and gave up. 
To the money situation op, what did you offer your ds instead of the money present? Did you ds receive a present of equal value, equal in his mind? [/quote]

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