Reply to Could you please keep your kids off the screens when family is visiting?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What weird responses. OP, I get why some people think you’re being “judgey,” but I like you and your lack of hard candy and think as long as you aren’t being extreme in your opinion and practice, you’re fine.

Geez— “screens can’t be addictive!”

“You are expecting a 7-year-old to be an ‘unpaid babysitter’ for a 5-year-old because you think they might play *anything* together!” (They’re 7 and 5, not 14 and 2!)

“Kids need ‘downtime’, which involves isolating themselves from everyone else for extended periods of time and almost never interacting with other kids!”

“Thank goodness he’s on his own screen nonstop or he might— gasp!— transmit germs to your child! Germs!!”

Very few parents completely disallow screen time, especially at these ages, and those who limit it rarely do it out of some need to feel morally superior or because they “don’t understand the science.”  Come on, folks.

I think it’s also true that some parents are pretty oblivious to the sheer amount and the circumstances under which both their kids and they, themselves, use screens. They’re in the minority, so I’m not about to blather on and on about the downfall of society, but I definitely know some neurotypical (or neurotypical enough!) kids who ask for the wifi password first thing, whose parents let them cart electronics around everywhere and seem oblivious to the fact that their kids aren’t playing with anyone else. (This can go for books, too, though I’ve not seen that in recent memory— and for most kids, even bookworms, books are less absorbing.)  Like, these parents will go on and on about how much their kid wants to see your kid, and as they leave, they will pose their kid for a pic with yours, maybe having engaged them both in some conversation or activity for literally 5 or 10 minutes out of a 3-hour-visit, and say— sincerely!— “Oh, it’s so great when we can get the kids together!”

And you just stand there like... “Okay...”

Some people, even very nice people, seem to have their attention so divided that they don’t realize how they and their family are experienced by others. Meaning if they have had their nose in their phone for 2.5 hours and interacted with you for 30 minutes, they feel as though the world was frozen in time for the 2.5 hours and they only fondly remember the 30 minutes of time together. But the world wasn’t stopped— it was staring expectantly and awkwardly at the tops of their heads, waiting for them to look up.  [/quote]

Wow, you're thirsty. If someone doesn't seem interested in interacting with me, I do not stare expectantly and awkwardly at them. I turn my attention to the other people who DO seem to want to engage. Or I busy myself with a magazine, a puzzle, a walk around the lake, folding a load of laundry, etc. [/quote]

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