Reply to Allow identical twins to answer to wrong name?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My father was an identical twin who went by "the twins".

It was the greatest psychological barrier he had to overcome in his lifetime.  It hindered his development of a separate personality.  He wishes his mother had dressed him different from his twin.

Regardless of what your twins say they want, its your job to decide what's in their best interest.  Differentiating in every way possible is in their best interest.  Do what you can to help that happen.  Different shoes embroidered names on the back of their shirts, whatever.  Give them the best start you can by helping people know who is who.[/quote]

Forcing either extreme isn’t the best choice. Allowing the kids to decide what they want, within reason, seems to be the best approach. Forcing haircuts and never allowing them to choose to dress alike seems as terrible as forcing them to look the same. Not sure why this is so difficult to see. [/quote]

Poster you're quoting.  I never said she should force them to wear different clothes or hair do's.  Not sure why this is difficult to see.

I simply think it's in the children's best interest to have strangers able to differentiate between them.  I've seen the serious adult damage two twins have suffered due to adults' lack of foresight on this issue.  Unless you actually know identical twins who are glad people couldn't tell them apart, I think your experience is significantly less relevant.[/quote]

You said differentiate in every way possible on a thread that earlier suggested forcing them into separate haircuts. It sounded like you meant differentiate in every way possible, now it sounds like you’re saying correct people if they use the wrong name.

Either way, forcing any version of the right way of being twins onto a child seems like a bad way to parent if it’s not what the kids want. [/quote]

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