Reply to What to do when there is no "village"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t understand this village concept.  What is it you want from others?  You want them to help you out with childcare and chores?  Or do you want to make friends?  [/quote]

I posted earlier about creating a village and for me it is: having someone who I can text and ask to pick up my kid from school or give them a ride home from practice (and I am happy to do the same), a neighborhood teen to feed the cat when we are away (we are friendly with her parents), someone to bring in our mail when we are away (neighbors), [b]someone to celebrate occasions with and invite over for pizza or impromptu dinners[/b]. Other people who know and care about my children (besides family)  [b]People to share stories with and get advice from[/b]. In my case the above people are both friends, and friendly acquaintances (parents of my kids’ friends). [b]Knowing we are not alone[/b], and knowing other people have my back in a pinch (and I, theirs). It makes parenting and family life a lot easier and less lonely. [/quote]

Yes!!!!  I really don't care about people watching my kids or giving them rides.  That's such a small part of the village.

Who do you call when you're trying out a new recipe that your hoping to make for you MIL next week?  Who will eat it and tell you exactly how they feel?  Better yet, they already have met your MIL and know how she will react?  Who can you call and say I'll be over in 5 with a bottle of wine--DH is being an ass.  And their husband says, okay, I'll hang out in the basement tonight.  Who do you call when your SN kid makes it through the school day without a phone call?  Who do you call when your 3 yr old comes down the stairs in Feb in their halloween costume and announces they're going trick or treating?  And yes, when you leave a VM that your mom had a heart attack and you're at the hospital, please take care of my kids after school; I'll call you when I can---you know that is one thing you don't have think about at the moment.

Life is about sharing your experiences-the good and the bad of life.  As the PP says, knowing someone has your back.  Your "village" is not about someone providing you free labor.  It's your friends and family.  It's your community.  This used to be built in when family lived close together.  Now you actively have to make it happen.  [/quote]

+ a million to both of these. [/quote]

++++ a billion to both of these[/quote]

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