Reply to Bar Mitzvah Protocol Question: Invite Out of Town Parents?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yeah, it was rude of them to invite themselves but you created the mess by inviting out of town kids without giving them any kind of logistical info or guidance (not even the hotel info? Why the heck not?!?)
At this point, maybe email ALL the parents of out of town camp kids that rsvp’d and say that four camp kids are coming, and you are so excited to see them all, and here’s the logistics for the day... you’ll provide a van or whatever to get from hotel to party, and you’re happy to help match kids up with a place to stay if they need it.
[b]You need to take some responsibility for the safety and logistics of kids you invited to this party if you aren’t willing to let their parents be involved.[/b][/quote]

Yeah, I agree with this. The way the parents invited themselves was off-putting, but they were responding to the lack of information on your end. The only way to uninvite them is for you to respond with logistics: "Sorry I didn't let you know sooner, but kids traveling alone can stay with so and so, and kids traveling with parents will receive transportation to and from the even if they stay at X hotel. We regret that we are unable to invite parents traveling with campers to attend."

But uninviting them makes you look really ungracious and cheap, regardless of the way they invited themselves. If you can't afford a few more people you have planned a party far beyond your means.[/quote]

At this point, the best option is just to roll with it- throw out the logistics angle while suggesting that they attend the ceremony. Honestly, most parents from out of town would probably love the option of going out to dinner/date night in DC while their kid is at a BM! If that doesn't seem to get the response that you want, then just suck it up and add 2 more guests to the party and move on.

And, lastly, FFS- do not give your son even the tiniest inkling that this drama is transpiring. Don't talk about it in front of him, even indirectly. Your son and his friend have 0% responsibility for the situation at hand- there is no reason for their relationship to be harmed by this.  [/quote]

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