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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Ok, yes. This is OP. I’ve tried to be better about this and in fact, we went on a date together last weekend (not just a couple days ago but the previous weekend). I guess my issue also is that I’m wondering how this is going to improve his general malaise and dislike of active parenting. I will absolutely work on giving him more attention but I guess I need to adjust my expectations of his role as a dad.[b] My fear is that he is going to end up like his dad, who was always emotionally distant and totally uninvolved and now has never even met his grandkids. [/b]
I think hearing from some of the Pp’s that can relate to his feelings eases this fear somewhat, so thank you. 
Honestly, it goes without saying but is worth repeating: I am dead tired by the end of the day. Anyone with young kids knows this feeling! I need to figure out how to care more about spending time with DH when that’s not my “love language” (as it is his). [/quote]
I think this is it.  He doesn't know how to be the kind of dad you want him to be.

IMO, if you are trying to be the kind of wife he wants you to be, shouldn't he try to be the kind of father you want him to be? This isn't about you wanting something for yourself. This is about you wanting something for both your children.

I keep hearing that women should "fake it till they make it" when it comes to wanting sex with their DHs. Maybe men should do the same when it comes to being a dad?[/quote]

+1000

Not clear why one PP derailed things by saying you aren’t focusing on your marriage.  All you wrote was how much your husband doesn’t like solo time with the kids and finds it too difficult and tiring.

Parenting is 24/7/365 and no sick days.

Yes you can hire some sitters here and there, but you can’t outsource many aspects of running a family and household. [/quote]

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