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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’ve put in a call to my therapist, but am feeling sad and alone right now, as I sit here at a rest stop nursing my 4 month old, and thought I’d write it out. I usually don’t think much about being a mom of two boys, but on Easter, we went to a party where there were 5 or 6 little girls age 2 and under, and my sons were the only boys there. Seeing the girls in their cute dresses just hit me, [b]like why did these other families or moms get lucky and I didn’t? [/b]I was hoping that stung feeling would fade in a few days, and it has a bit, but I still think about it when I see a mom with a daughter. I love both of my sons, but I just feel unlucky — I am working so hard to bring them up, and they are going to ultimately join another family and not be close with me, and I’ll be alone. The pattern in my family is that I am close with my mom and my brother is emotionally distant (on another continent even!) from all of us. DH calls his mom every week, by contrast, but still, my MIL talks with her daughter every day by phone. I’m just not going to have that, most likely.

Please critique, interrogate my thinking. I know my self pity is too much and yet I can’t seem to boot myself out of this loop. [/quote]

To play devil's advocate, maybe there was a childless couple at the same gathering, or a couple suffering from secondary infertility, who looked at you and your two boys and thought "why did she get to be so lucky?" We were that couple for years. We still know those couples.

I also agree that there is no way to predict what kind of relationship anyone will have with their kids in the future, and that it's less about gender and more about how you cultivate the relationship you have with them as they are growing up.                              [/quote]

Or a parent of children with special needs who desperately wishes for healthy and/or cognitively typical kids  The poster who talked about reckoning with your real vs idealized situation is right[/quote]

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