Reply to Access to kids, why do you feel entitled?

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[quote=Anonymous]I have a relative that is furious that I will not "give  her" my kids so she can build a special relationship with them because she couldn't have kids.

While I have empathy for her not having kids, my kids do not want to spend time with her. She is overbearing, self centered and pushy and makes them feel very uncomfortable. She has poor judgement, drinks too much hard alcohol and you never know when she is slightly drunk or just behaving crazy. DH and I have declined her constant requests politely but then she will corner the kids putting them on the spot demanding to do special auntie things with them that they don't want to do. They come find us to rescue them and we say no again. She has been so pushy with them that at this point there is nothing that she could offer that would make them want to be with her alone.

DH and I finally had to tell her that they were not interested and that I wasn't going to force them. She persisted and protested so I went ahead and told her that DH and I were tired of her not taking no for answer and it was unacceptable for her to be badging our children. DH and I decided that we had to limit contact with her. She has become furious about this and has now deleted me from the family email list that she uses to control all announcements and event invitations. I could say something but I'm somewhat relieved to be off her radar and don't really care as other relatives will happily share the event info with me as she is never the host, just the controller.

I am 100% that she feels entitled to our kids simply because she wants them and has rationalized this entitlement in her mind. This is her problem to deal with on her own. DH and I are responsible for protecting our kids. We have plenty of normal relatives that they can spend time with and have normal relationships with instead of forcing them into a dysfunctional one with a crazy person.

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