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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Ive made it very clear to my kids (22, 28, 31) we will not put our retirement at risk. What I am happy to offer that isn't money is free housing if necessary (move back home not me paying your rent) and free childcare.  Those don't cost me money, they cost me space and time and that's something Im still willing to give freely since it doesn't put our future at risk![/quote]

My parents did the same for me and my siblings. However, my brother - the middle child - seems to think he is entitled to continual help from my parents into his mid 30s. My parents have financially bailed him out so many times and he still thinks he deserves more. He can't hold a job, can't ever get in a financially stable state (and he has a wife and a teenage son). If it wasn't for my parents, my brother would be in jail and his mentally ill wife would be homeless.

So while you can set firm boundaries, not all your kids will listen. My sister and I did remarkably well living on our, balancing college/work/student loans, and now raising families in homes that we bought ourselves without parental help. My brother? He's acting as if he was raised in a completely different family.

It's really changed some of my views on the nature vs. nurture debate.[/quote]

I wonder if your parents keep bailing him and his crazy wife out just to save the kid.  My mother always bails out my sister, who is divorced with two kids and living with a crazy person.  It drives me nuts, but then I realize that if my mother didn't give them money and gifts, those kids would be even more screwed than they already are. So, I forget about it. [/quote]

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