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[quote=Anonymous]I think what is really unproductive here is looking at it as “your” money and “his” money or “his” loans, “your” savings, etc. I am sympathetic but the law doesn’t see it that way and so neither should you. Your husband is no more a liability than a low-earning wife and breadwinning husband. People would be changing their tune if genders were reversed, I think. You admit he is a good dad so just something to keep in mind.

I am certainly not saying you don’t have a right to be upset and frustrated, but I am not sure why you thought he would change. You met him well after he was 40 and unless he actively hid information from you, you knew his financial situation - and honestly shouldn’t have touched it with a ten foot pole. But there’s no going back now. What do you love about him? What made you want to marry him? Focus on those things.

I think you need to go to counseling and put all of your feelings on the table. Divorce is not going to favor you nor make things easier on anyone, so I’d think long and hard about it. [/quote]

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