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[quote=Anonymous]My experience, for what it's worth:

I NEVER thought I'd SAH.  And I remember the exact moment I realized I might end up doing just that, and I remember clearly the horror and shame that I felt.  I had been so ambitious in my career, and there were so many parts of it that I loved.

And yet... My DH clearly loved his career more than I loved mine, and I saw how happy it made him, and I was jealous.  His career also paid way more generously, with the potential for serious wealth, whereas mine never would.  And slowly I realized that although I did love aspects of my career, I also loved being with my children all day (not everyone does, and that's okay) and doing all sorts of little domestic tasks.

I'm sure I could have been happy if I'd kept working, but not working has made our family life so much more relaxed.  My DH would not have stayed in his career had I not quit my job, and he regularly credits how (relatively!) stress-free our life is to my choice to stay home.  It also helped his career take off, and now we are reaping the financial benefits.

In total I've been a SAHM for almost 10 years, through 3 kids.  I would like to work part-time in a couple years, but I would always like to be able to pick the kids up from school, take them to doctors appointments, volunteer for field trips, and be the one who stays home on sick and snow days, so I know my future career is still going to be limited.

But, I wouldn't trade it for anything.  It was the right choice, for me.  Kids grow up so fast.  Everyone regrets something, and there are times when I long for a career, but (for me) I'd rather long for a career than long for more time with my children.

It has to be a choice you and your DH make together, though.  Don't feel like you MUST stay home because DH refuses to scale back.  That's a recipe for resentment.  It's important, as a SAHM, to feel appreciated by your spouse.  Also, it's important to know that NOTHING IS PERMANENT.  I never ever ever thought I'd be home for 10 years.  Every year I reevaluated.  And I think doing so helped me feel in control.

Good luck![/quote]

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