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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A lot of holier than thou parents here.

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+1  [/quote]
No, I am usually of the no big deal kind. But, she is clearly stressed about the other two, didn't pay attention to her older, and then she hit him, after allowing him to read and stay up late. He has to manage his time better...he is ten, maybe he can, maybe he can't. Impression is that OP is putting too much pressure on the oldest child who is generally a good kid. This is so typical, good kid has to manage his time, do everything right, never gets a pass, and I bet you OP is more strict on him. Older kids know and recognize this parental behavior. OP should apologize and explain that she was also wrong about letting him stay up. Just because other two are pains doesn't mean she bullies the oldest child and doesn't parent him. 
OP, I say this honestly, there is no regret in your posts, that is the most troubling part. Even parents that smack a kid who deserve it(which I am not sure what that is...) feel remorse, you don't seem to. Why is that?[/quote]
What in the world makes you think OP doesn't feel remorse?  I get the sense that she does, hence she posted here. Why would she post on here if she didn't feel badly for what happened?  [/quote]
Where is the remorse?? All I am getting is, he lied, he wasn't on time, he didn't prepare, my other two are sick or pains, he is normally a good kid... Did she say maybe he is acting up because I had no time for him due to other two being difficult? She screamed and yelled and hit, come on. Plenty of us had a grabby, obnoxious kid and might have smacked their hand especially in the car if it was dangerous... but I know when I did that a couple of times, in the spur of the moment, inside I was dying and feeling as the worst parent ever. I made sure to keep an eye on losing my temper, I am the parent, not ok for a parent to scream, yell and hit. Let's hear from OP. Do you feel bad for yelling and screaming and hitting your kid? If she does, I will apologize to her.[/quote]

Of course I feel remorse. That’s why I posted. I was hoping for some empathy. Been there. Done that. My kids have missed the bus. Let him do poorly on a test. We all have bad days. I should have known better.[/quote]
In that case I am sorry. 
Yes, let him to poorly on a test, but try not to hit your kid. He is ten, and a good kid, per your post. Hitting is almost always parent taking their own frustration on the kid. I suspect that is what happened with you. We are all for been there, done that. I was that good older child, that is why I reacted strongly to your post. There was no middle ground for me, as I think is the case with most older good kids. I think if you take a step back and look at it, you will see that your expectations of your 10 year old are too much. Maybe because you are busy with the other two right now? I remember once I failed a test and was scared of mom, so to make sure she knew I kind of yelled from the porch as she was coming home, "mom, I got a bad grade." She walked in and beat me, didn't ask any questions. I love my mom, and would never cut her off, times were different so I understand. But, here I am approaching 50 and still remember that day vividly. I was an A student almost all the time. It was a sudden test that nobody prepared for and teacher asked me as I was  the "nerdy" kid thinking I knew it ahead of time. I am just saying, you were angry, don't do it again. I was maybe 12, 13 at the time this happened, kids remember.
So, move on and try, that is all we can do, try better. Try to stop yelling, and screaming and hitting. Mom doesn't remember any of this anymore, she claims I am lying if I bring it up. So, I don't, but I remember and all the other occasions. Sure, slap is different than a beating. You can bet the whole class knows you smacked him today. So here it goes, I am sorry I was harsh on you in my posts, I will try to do better and be more understanding towards your reasons and give you a benefit of the doubt, even if you are just a stranger op on dcum. I hope you do the same for your son.[/quote]

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