Reply to Tips for dating divorced dads? How to interact with their kids or their mom if you meet them?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I won't lie, it's hard.  My ex husband's new GF was always very standoffish with me, I don't understand why.  I don't expect to be best friends but she was really cold.  I guess I would say, attempt to make small talk of the ex does with you.  If you are at a time and place where that's appropriate. 
 You can talk about the weather or the Redskins or traffic in DC, whatever.  
I will say that her coldness was actually a good thing in that she was uninterested in my children.  Never tried to become their other mom or compete with me there, for which I am very grateful.  
She's gone now, relationship ended after 7 years.  I'm grateful my kids had a stable woman in their dad's life for those critical years.  [/quote]

I'm a divorced dad following this thread and just wanted to give props to the PP here, who seems to have a great perspective.  
[/quote] I think it’s sad if you think there’s anything “great” about that post. Stepmom is “cold”?  “Uninterested” in the children?  Dad needs s “stable” woman in his life?  This is how low the expectations of the new woman the ex DH subjects his kid to have fallen?  God help your kids. [/quote]

I was saying her perspective was great, not that her situation was great.  She can't control who her ex dates.  I'm guessing that it was not her desire for the new GF to be cold to her or her kids.  But she can't control that, so she is expressing appreciation for what she can--that she has been able to continue to be a good parent to her kids and that their dad had a single GF and not rotating women.  I say that is a great perspective, because most people (especially here) complain about new partners' failings without trying to see the positive side.  This is not my situation--my ex has always been very warm to my fiancee and vice-versa, and I'm grateful they get along well--but I can see how the situation must have been tough on the PP and I appreciate her ability to put a good spin on it.

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