Reply to 18 year old daughter in a bad path

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My stepdaughter FITB her first tattoo at 17.  My DH hated it but decided to ignore it because he knew she just did it for attention.  Then he found pot in her room and basically berated her for the stupidity of getting caught but not the using (he uses too so sees it as no big deal).  Then she got another tattoo, and another, and then a sleeve, and he was SO infuriated with her but assiduously avoided any conflict or confrontation with her.

All the while, I was like, “She’s DOING this for you’re attention!  GIVE IT to her!  He’s screaming outfield boundaries that aren’t there.”  But he didn’t want to “reward” her attention seeking.

Fast forward 7 years.  She covered her body in tattoos, became a stripper, developed a heroin habit, and has been in jail too many times to count.  I know she has prostituted herself for drugs but my DH can’t handle even thinking about the stripping, much less worse.  We’d paid for rehab but it doesn’t stick.  My DH thinks it’s too late for parenting.  I think she’s still screaming out for a dad to tell her to cut it out and pay attention to her.  Lots of attention.

If someone is crying out for attention toon, why not give it to them?  I think teenagers WANY boundaries.  That doesn’t mean she will like them or be compliant.  But you have yo have rules.  SHE has to know where the boundaries are.  Anything else is terrifying.[/quote]

i have no idea why you think your stepdaughter is doing all this “for attention”.[/quote]

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