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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Some are more difficult than others.

Our first, who is in her first year of college, knew the rules and respected them.  We had zero push-back from her.  If we said be home by 1 AM, she was always home by then and never pushed to be out later or did the endless loop of "why?  why?  why?"

Our second, who is almost 17, is still a good kid and respects the rules, but is now more apt to pushing them.  Our rule is that he can Uber, but he has to contact one of us to order the Uber so we can have the driver's info. and see the route.  He was grounded last week because we found out that he bought an Uber giftcard that he was using.  "I don't understand why I'm being punished for being a responsible adult who used his own money to buy something!"

Our third, who is almost 16, could sell a lifetime supply of condoms to a nun.  He's suave, he's a talker and a charmer, and he uses all of those traits to trick you if you're not paying attention and listening for subtext.  Example, he signed into an old iPod touch and left it with a friend so that when he was tracked via Find my iPhone, it showed him there and not in DC.  He would have gotten away with it if his friend hadn't tagged him in a photo on Instagram.  He's the first kid we've had to specify, "you cannot leave the state" when giving him permission to go hang out with friends.  Not once but twice the past summer either his mother or I texted to see if he was eating dinner at home that night only to discover he was in a completely different state (once they drove to Ocean City, MD for the day because they wanted to go to the beach and the other time they drove to Philly to satisfy a cheese steak craving).

Our fourth is just entering the tween years and has so far been pleasant.  Much like the first in terms of attitude toward the rules, but only time will tell.   
  [/quote]

My brother was like your third child. Suave was the word I used too. My poor mother pulled out her hair over him. He was the reason I got dragged into family therapy. I talked to the therapist once by myself after a few sessions and he said I no longer had to come to family therapy. The problem was 100% my brother. He took years off my mom's life (and she was a single mother too) but somewhere around age 23 or 24, his brain matured and he actually apologized to my mom. I was an easy kid partly because I felt sorry for my mom having to deal with my older brother. My son is a lot like my older brother. In fact, my mom will call my son by my brother's name when he annoys her. God must have a sense of humor. [/quote]

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